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Showing posts from November, 2018

Take the Time

A friend of mine has an underweight problem she has been fighting for a few months. She's been visiting a dietitian who subscribed a radically different diet. My friend was somewhat shaken by this new diet, because it would mean a dramatic change to her daily routine, her shopping and cooking habits and at some level her daily balance. After a few minutes of explaining to me, she broke down into tears, because of the burden of changes.

It occurred to me that she didn't have do this. She had a choice to not do the diet. Even better, she had the choice to do the diet at her own pace. I advised her to not mind the dietitian too much, but if she really wanted to do the diet, she should stay committed to it, and do it at a pace she felt comfortable. So no, no habits and routines need to be changed overnight. She could do it over a period of weeks or months. So long as she's gaining weight, it should be OK to take the time!

The next morning I got a call from her, that this simp…

Good people with bad habits

In professional relationships..

Bad people with bad habits: it’s easy to catch early and filter them out.

Good people with good habits are too rare. They hardly come by.

But good people with bad habits are more common.

These are the people whose enormous potential is being blocked by some self deceptions going on in their minds, that they don’t see, but others around them can tell. As always, those around us know a lot more about us than we ourselves (though 99.9% of the times we think it’s the other way around).

So what to do?

It turns out that good old objectivity is our best friend.

Consider a programmer I used to work with. He was an honest guy with good intentions to do a good job. At the end of the day however, he would live up to 40% of his potential. But he felt enormous stress in accomplishing even that. Worse yet, he thought he was giving his 100%.

How could we tell it was only 40%? We counted the number of lines of code he wrote, which averaged no more than 30 per day. Now…

Death & Detachment

When death comes, it's time to give everything up..    everything you built and love.    everyone you love. That's why people don't want to talk about it. It's sad, scarily sad.
I think being prepared for death is the ultimate act of detachment. And in detachment lies peace. As a sane man, would you choose peace or conflict within?
At any point in my life, I would like to have my dependents entitled to whatever I want to provide them. And that is limited. I want all my debts kept paid. Those things I create, I hope there are care-takers for it, and they benefit from them in future. Those people that had love for me, hopefully I did enough for them, that they do not remember any emotional debt.
Detachment then, is the key to living and dying a free life.